One moment can capture a lifetime

Where do the years go? I’m standing in the commons of the high school celebrating awards for my daughter and her friends. We are laughing, talking, and tears come up. This is it. Senior. Graduating. Moving on. The last child to fly the nest. I see our neighbor from over 16 years ago. When we first moved into the neighborhood they bought the house next to ours a few months later to our arrival. They have a son Valentina’s age and they played together from about two years old to 4 years old. They moved shortly after their arrival. We always remembered them as we would see them in the community from time to time. Yet, in this moment, summing up the last 16 years of the loss of my father, who lives in the house now, and a soon to be college student, my life flashed before my eyes. I was laughing and talking while all the while my chest was welling up and my eyes were holding back tears. How can a life time of backyard parties, vacations, celebrations, rooms painted different colors, fights over boundaries and coming of age, first job, first tooth, first boyfriend, first dance, all of it be told in a two minute conversation? It seemed like I just checked a box and ran out of paper.

What will the next chapter or even a different book hold for our family? I’ve been in conversations with friends who have been here. I knew the day would come for me, too. You can’t really describe how it feels. You have to walk this road with your life stories and people. In some ways with yourself.

There is no good in regrets or “wish I would have”. I brush those off and celebrate the journey for the story it tells and how it continues to unravel. I close my eyes sometimes and see pictures and stories. A lifetime of memories.

Young moms caught up in diapers, soccer, and sleepless nights, time will pass quickly and you will watch your young ones move on and forward in life. Start now remembering who God created you to be beyond motherhood. Yes, your role, right now, demands your time and attention. Steal away moments and retreats to reconnect to your soul work. It’s not selfish. It’s healthy. Do this not in anger or pride but in love and respect for yourself. To all the moms young, old, and some place in between, I’m praying for you. We will rise, move mountains, and get through this together.

4 Comments Add yours

  1. Carolyn Boyce says:

    Losing my partner in life was devastating after a two year span of sickness and hospitalizations. Trying to raise and continue to support my two children. . .
    Life goes on whether you’re ready for it or not. God was and always has been on my side and my life. I believe in guardian angels and I truly believe mine is my father who passed in 1992. It’s a tough world but you have to keep going and rise above all the setbacks. Now both of my grown children are fighting sickness. I know God heard my prayers but I wonder every day “when are things going to turn around “

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Carolyn,
      Your life story has always been a testimony to God holding you through suffering and so many losses. I can see where you would question “when are things going to turn around”. I know that your prayers are for complete healing and peace. I pray those things for you and your beautiful children. I pray that God will define “turn around” just for you. Only you with Him can figure this thing out. Your strong relationship with Him will be your anchor as you move forward during these trying times. We do rise, move, and do the next thing in His love and grace.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. ashleythomasrn says:

    This line spoke to me: setting getaways/time for yourself “It’s not selfish. It’s healthy.” thank you!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Oh yes! Remember the verse, “Jesus went away to a quiet place to rest….”

      Liked by 2 people

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