I’m a control freak like most moms. We can’t help ourselves. Even if you claim first prize in the “hands off approach”, when the stakes are high, I’m sure you rev up the engine of your helicopter. Maybe not, but it brings me comfort knowing you might. You know, normalization.
I could share the crazy back story of how my mom anxiety got the best of me, but I think you know. The list you manage while away. Anything from clean underwear and their favorite breakfast foods to she needs Cotillion shoes and a ride there and back. I want this post to be more about how God answered my prayers.
God gave my husband and I a gift of alone time. This alone time meant that I would have to ask for help from family and friends, and, trust that, while I was away, the universe would still work without me. Well, my little universe in my cul-de-sac. I found it hard to ask for help, to say no to other events, and to be okay with this precious gift. I mean, this is too good to be true. We don’t travel much, so any place AWAY and the opportunity to be ALONE (I’m an introvert), means my personal batteries and love life will be recharged.
While away, I woke up literally wanting to run back home while my husband was busy talking about all the wonderful things we could do in DC. His voice became the Peanut’s gang teacher, and all I could think of is how can I do both–get home AND please him. He went to shower, and I began to read my Bible and pray.
I Peter 5
“So, be content with who you are, and don’t put on airs. God’s strong hand is on you; he’ll promote you at the right time. Live carefree before God; He is most careful with you.”
Another verse encouraged us to CELEBRATE LIFE!
We giggled. We read this in a museum and noted that this morning we hysterically laughed at………..Well, I can’t share everything, but it was pretty funny. 🙂
God moved into my space and said, “Listen my child, I have given you this day to enjoy and celebrate life. Anna, will you please go and live carefree knowing that I am most careful with all the things you are worried about? I got this.”
I looked up synonyms for carefree just to make sure I was hearing Him right. ( I know that’s funny, but it helps me.)
unworried, cheerful, irresponsible (oh gosh), happy, radiant (loved that one), lighthearted (oh please, yes, please), relaxed, and laid-back….
Don’t be (Antonyms)….
worried, gloomy, sad, depressed, melancholy, careworn, and down in the dumps
And I will be (God)…
attentive, vigilant, and watchful
I broke free that day with the help of family and friends, and most of all, God’s careful attention to us.
This morning I awoke to K-Love’s verse
“So, Christ has truly set us free. NOW (do you notice this little, big word?) make sure that you STAY FREE, and don’t get tied up again in slavery to the law.” Galatians 5:1
In Philipians 4 God begs us to think on the beautiful and the best, not the worst.
If you are a parent who closes your eyes and imagines the worst and lives in fear, pray for God to untangle your thoughts, and to help you notice all the beauty and FREEDOM. Mistakes and the worst may happen, but God’s truth and beauty never fades or disappears. You always have this gift from Him in the midst of it all.
Live with gratitude
Live in peace
Thank you mom and dad for the cotillion shoes. Thank you Mary Kay for picking up my girl and making it special. Out of nowhere, another family pitched in and took her out to dinner after the dance. Thank you Lamb family and Vivian for being present in Papa’s life and his book signing and helping to love on your sisters.
Later that night when I got home, we watched The Lego movie until Valentina came home. She was excited to show us all her new dances….
Our Love Song for the Weekend……
Be “home” with your love, be free with them, feel like a child again, feel clean again…..
Parish….I will ALWAYS love you…
The sun was setting as we drove home. One star in the sky led us back to our home. I would glance out my window and see the one star pointing us back and reminding us of His promises.