When “cultivating good” is hard

“Always be humble and gentle.  Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.” Ephesians 4:2

Often cultivating good (yesterday’s post) is hard because the faults of others are like sandpaper rubbing against our skin.  The most challenging relationships are those that have been intimate for years and grace is extended over and over again.  We often wonder if things will ever change?  Not to excuse hurtful behavior, but I heard a pastor share on Focus on the Family about our frustrated spirit in dealing with a child’s behavior; however, the question posed was, “How long has God been dealing with YOUR behaviors?!”

I’m all about boundaries and bringing problems into the light but let us be reminded to balance with humility, gentleness, and love.  The beautiful example of the prodigal son and his father welcoming him home gives us the picture of a repented, changed heart seeking forgiveness, and the love of the father saying, “You are forgiven.”   Maybe the “other” in your life is still struggling with issues and is not repentant.  Stay strong in Jesus’ love and His Word.  His love will bring healing in your heart even if the relationship is not reconciled on earthly terms and you’ve been forced to set boundaries that are painful.

Come home to Jesus and allow His love to amaze you and restore you.

If you deeply struggle in this area I highly recommend saturating yourself daily in His Word, listening to online sermons from pastors you connect with, and listening to praise and worship music.  Instead of nursing the offense, worship Jesus.  On days when the thoughts are overwhelming talk to a trusted Christian friend and pray.  Remind yourself that Jesus conquered the grave and wants us to walk in the freedom of His mercy and grace.

My husband was my Christian friend this morning.  He shared a great visual with me.  “When you struggle with a negative thought or incident you tend to go to the closet of stored memories and happenings and bring out the past –connecting it to the one incident, and you become overwhelmed.”  I laughed, “That’s my amygdala–the wonderful storage of memories and feelings in my brain. ”  When your amygdala is hijacked it’s time to build a ladder out of that fear place to the intellectual part of your brain.

So this morning I’ve been worshiping through music, reading God’s Word, being mindful of my blessings that are right in front of me, spending time with you on the post and praying for us, and getting that “stuff” out of the dark into a conversation with my husband so he can hold me accountable and bring a sense of grounding back.

One of the worship songs this morning that was so healing: (video below and if no time to listen lyrics are below the video)

Meredith Andrews: In Your Arms

I’m turning the world off
Embracing the silence
Walking away from all the voices
That are Screaming in my ear

I’ve been too caught up
I’ve been so stressed out
All of the noise replaced the whisper
That used to be so clear

So I close every door
Put my face back on the floor

And I’m in Your arms
Where I belong
There’s no other place for me
Than right where You are
Some things just don’t change
When I call Your name
You never hesitate to wrap me in endless grace
When I’m in Your arms

I’m letting my fears go
Giving You control
For You are the one who holds me closer
In my soul’s darkest night

Everything I see
Is so temporary
So help me to run the race before me
With eternity in sight

Now I close every door
Put my face back on the floor

And I’m in Your arms
Where I belong
There’s no other place for me
Than right where You are
Some things just don’t change
When I call Your name
You never hesitate to wrap me in endless grace
When I’m in Your arms

To sit at Your feet
At Your table of mercy
To gaze on Your beauty, my Lord
To drink from Your well
And be changed by Your glory
How could I ask for more
Jesus, how could I ask for more

And I’m in Your arms
Where I belong
There’s no other place for me
Than right where You are
Some things just don’t change
When I call Your name
You never hesitate to wrap me in endless grace
When I’m in Your arms

The Prodigal Son

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s